• Killed In The Name Neurotypical Mercy
  • The Man and His Mind

My 'Morning' Coffee

~ Just a few words from the Neurodifferent side

My 'Morning' Coffee

Tag Archives: loneliness

my receiver is broken

04 Wednesday Apr 2018

Posted by Henric C. Jensen in AS, asperger's, Autism, Socializing

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

loneliness, social rules, unwritten rules

n.e.d_thumb.pngfor some reason i just don’t compute with social media. or with people on social media. i am either too blunt or too subtle. either way it seems that i end up hurting people or pushing their buttons in ways i never intended. it is discouraging. it makes me feel insecure and odd – even in the autistic community. there are unwritten rules everywhere – ‘do this’, ‘don’t do that’, ‘do this, but not that way’, ‘do that, and do it the right way’ – it is infuriating, confusing and depressing.  it is also scary. of course i won’t agree with everybody i meet, and some wont agree with me. it is all those unwritten rules – ‘remember, you are with us now – have to do it the way we do it’. yes. i read the rules. ‘not those rules, the other rules’ – what other rules? ‘the rules we are not telling you about’.  OK – so even in the autistic community there are rules that are hidden, unspoken. and i am somehow supposed know them through some sort of secret radio waves? my receiver isn’t pinging me, so it must be broken. and right now i feel very much alone and lonely. i wonder when my receiver will be repaired.

Advertisement

Rate this:

Share this:

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Email
  • WhatsApp
  • Skype
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Pocket
  • Print
  • LinkedIn
  • Reddit
  • Telegram

Like this:

Like Loading...

Special Interests and Loneliness

23 Friday Mar 2018

Posted by Henric C. Jensen in AS, ASD, Special Interests

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

friends, life, loneliness

Books1.png

my special interest is studying and talking about “torah, talmud and (jewish)theology”. not many, if any, on fb has that special interest. yesterday was a day when i felt extremely lonely in this (i always feel lonely in this, but yesterday was extreme). i said to a friend:

“if only my special interest had been trains (like a normal aspie) or britney spears (like a normal gay aspie). no, no, i had to pick torah… which no normal yid cares about as long as a rabbi doesn’t tell them they can’t eat chinese on xmas. i tried joining other torah groups on fb, but most of them are either militant orthodox or wishy-washy renewal. in the first kind i know too little and in the second kind i either know too much or am ‘too jewish’.”

it is true, i feel lonely. i have always felt lonely, on the outside looking in – i have never had a group of my equals to share my special interest with. it is painful.

 

 

Rate this:

Share this:

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Email
  • WhatsApp
  • Skype
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Pocket
  • Print
  • LinkedIn
  • Reddit
  • Telegram

Like this:

Like Loading...

friends…

16 Thursday Aug 2012

Posted by Henric C. Jensen in ADHD/AS, Random Thoughts, Socializing

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

calls, friends, loneliness, reciprocation, relationships

tedd1

in real life i do not have any friends. except my wife. some 10-12 years ago i was told that if i was always the one calling and initiating social stuff, the relationship(s) were imbalanced and unequal. so i stopped calling the few friends i had, to give them a chance to reciprocate. they never did. even people who claimed i was part of their family, said they loved me, never called me once in those 10-12 years. the only person who ever gave me any explanation was the one i had been friends with the longest – “you are too much”, he said.

too much what?

i don’t know, and i am not likely to ever know. yes, i am bitter, and i am lonely. and confused.

apart from the home assistance team that comes around twice a week to help me clean and a paid personal contact whom i meet once a month i have no social connections in real life.

0.000000 0.000000

Rate this:

Share this:

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Email
  • WhatsApp
  • Skype
  • Pinterest
  • Tumblr
  • Pocket
  • Print
  • LinkedIn
  • Reddit
  • Telegram

Like this:

Like Loading...

The Man And His Mind

  • Killed In The Name Neurotypical Mercy
  • The Man and His Mind
The articles, including artworks and photos in this Blog are Copyright © Henric C. Jensen aka Shadow Bear/Silly Old Bear and are NOT public domain - unless otherwise specified.
Contact: Email

Daily Cups

June 2023
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
252627282930  
« May    

Past Cups

  • Acceptance and Inclusion – Not Assimilation
  • Living with Autistic Burnout – Lethargy
  • Autistic Burnout
  • Forced Social Interactions
  • ABA is torture. ABA therapists are equal to Dr Mengele.

Table Conversations

Henric C. Jensen on where is the normal image of…
Henric C. Jensen on where is the normal image of…
mummybear2017 on where is the normal image of…
Sharon Alison Butt on where is the normal image of…
autistic narrative,… on the final solution – gen…

Stored Cups

My other blogs

  • HCJ Artwork My Artblog
  • Life Collected Science, Humanism, Spirituality
  • Literary Lint My Writing Blog
  • SOB's Grins & Grumps Everything between Heaven and Earth

Other Peoples' Blogs

  • as2as
  • Aspergers & the Alien
  • ASPIE STRATEGY
  • Everyday Asperger's
  • i won't forget a single day
  • Life with Aspergers
  • The Liberated Way
  • themacroscope

Websites and Forums

  • Wrong Planet Wrong Planet is the web community designed for individuals (and parents / professionals of those) with Autism, Asperger’s Syndrome, ADHD, PDDs, and other neurological differences. We provide a discussion forum, where members communicate with each other, a

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 74 other subscribers

Drinkers so far

  • 2,576 served
  • RSS - Posts
  • RSS - Posts
  • RSS - Comments

Meta

  • Register
  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.com

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Follow Following
    • My 'Morning' Coffee
    • Join 41 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • My 'Morning' Coffee
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...
 

    %d bloggers like this: