This post – tells you what Autistic Burnout is. But it does not tell you what it is like living with Autistic Burnout. So lets start with the first symptom on the list that affects me.
I wake up in the morning. I have no energy. No enthusiasm for anything. All I want is to go back to sleep. However, once I am not sleeping my brain still lists all the things I NEED to do. All the things I WANT to do. They are usually household chores – I do not like household chores so I avoid them. The things I WANT to do are usually artistic stuffs – writing, creating art, reading, playing with my cat. Things I used to find joy, self-esteem and peace in doing. Things that used to fire me up in the morning at the mere thought of doing them. There is no fire in my furnace. I still do them – but there is no joy, self-esteem or peace in doing them. Just an even grey mixed with black and dark brown.